* BARNES & NOBLE GIFT CARD GIVEAWAY *

Don't forget that tomorrow, Wednesday March 16, is the deadline to leave a comment on my blog post of March 10, in order to be in the drawing for the gift card.

 

Again, I know that a $10 card won't buy much of anything at B&N,

but at least it can help a little! It can be used in a store or online.

I'll announce the winner on Thursday, March 17.

 

 

~~~~

This is me laughing, and having a great time at B&N

soon after my memoir came out in November 2013.

 

~~~~

This is me looking drunk at B&N

soon after my memoir came out in November 2013.

(I have no idea what I was doing or talking about.

Probably just acting goofy!)

 

~~~~

 

 

* Note: My memoir can be purchased at BN.com, but they don't carry it in their stores.

If people ask for it, they'll say they can order it. That was so disappointing at first because when I worked there, I dreamed about seeing my memoir on their shelves. I imagined it being right next to Colin Powell in the biography/memoir area. J

 

 

"You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream." -- Les Brown

* MY ERMA ENTRY....AND A GIFT CARD GIVEAWAY *

I've made the decision to post my entry for the Erma Bombeck 2016 Writing Competition here on my blog. Some of my writer pals have suggested they might save theirs for another contest, but after thinking it over, I didn't like the possibility of it being rejected...again!

 

(At the bottom, please keep scrolling and reading

 for some information about my entry, 

and also about a gift card giveaway)

 

 

Erma Bombeck

Husbands: Sometimes You Can’t Hardly Look at Them Without Snarling!

Boy, don’t I know it! What is it with men anyway? When it comes to listening to their wives, they either can’t understand simple directions, only hear part of what we say, or completely tune us out. My much-loved husband Ron, has been guilty of all three complaints a few times during our 33 years of marriage, but the most recent episode practically had me snarling in the aisles of a local grocery store.

It all began one morning at the checkout counter in an outlet mall, when I realized I didn’t have my debit card. Fortunately I had my Master Card tucked away in a special area of my purse…for Emergencies Only. I’d say this particular moment was definitely an emergency. I certainly didn’t want the embarrassment of announcing I didn’t have enough money.

After paying for my purchase, I walked to the parking lot in a daze, tossed my bags into my car, and climbed in…racking my brain the entire time. When did I use that card last? Where could it be? Was a bandit emptying out my “gigantic” bank account at this very moment?! I wondered about it as I drove to my next stop. Then it hit me! I used it the day before when I bought lunch, and tucked it inside the top pocket of my suit jacket.

As soon as I got to the grocery store, I called Ron and asked him to look in our bedroom closet for the jacket. I guess he heard “my brown winter coat in the coat closet.” Uh, no. Then he thought I said “a sweatshirt.” NO! I finally got him to listen enough to hear me say, “No, it’s in my side of our bedroom closet. Look for a lightweight jacket that has tiny red, black, and white squares, TINY squares.” I hear the noise of hangers being pushed back and forth.

“I don’t see anything like that.”

“It has to be right in front of you. It’s kind of like a shirt with a collar. It’s not a heavy jacket.”

More silence except the swishing of clothes and hangers. Once again he said it’s not there. I let out a heavy sigh, but kept my mounting frustration to myself.

 “Never mind. I’ll look when I get home. Thanks anyway, honey. Bye.”

As I pushed my cart along, he texted the words “Got it” along with a photo of the jacket and the card. Unbelievable.

When I got home, he said I hadn’t told him it had little squares, but that I’d said “polka dots.” Oh my gosh. Husbands. Sometimes you can’t hardly look at them (or listen to them) without snarling!

 

Okay, here's some info about this piece

 

I realize that "can't hardly" is not proper grammar! The entire title is something my dear friend, Rita W. said to me a few years ago. We were sitting at her kitchen table (isn't that just the best place to talk with your girlfriends?) and we were complaining about whatever our husbands were doing, or were not doing, at that time that was driving us crazy. As soon as those words came out of her mouth, I busted out laughing (which happened a lot when Rita was anywhere near) and said, "Hold on. I've got to write that down, so I don't forget it! I grabbed a pen and scrap paper from my purse, jotted it down, and have kept it ever since. It's all wadded up and in a huge envelope of notes and clippings of "writerly stuff." I'll write more about Rita another day, but for now just know that she was sweet, kind, motherly, hilarious, ETC! I've referred to her for years as Crazy Rita. She died about 2-1/2 years ago and I think of her every single day and miss her so much. I hope she's smiling at me right now, and making her crazy snarling face!



~~~ 

GIFT CARD GIVEAWAY

 







I have a Barnes & Noble gift card for $10.00 that can be used in a store or online. All you need to do is leave a comment here of any kind. Maybe you have a funny spouse story you'd like to share, or something about a wonderful friend, or what purchase you'd like to put your gift card toward...I realize $10.00 can't buy much of anything all by its little old self! (Drawing will be done next Wednesday, March 16)

 

Pinterest

~~~~~

 

from The Happy Page on Facebook



Hey you....you definitely make me happy!



* I did NOT win..... *

Finally the Erma Bombeck winners and honorable mentions have been listed on their website......

I did not win. I did not get an honorable mention......

Neither did any of my writer friends......

Maybe now I can sleep at night, or at least sleep without talking in my sleep ....like in giving my Thank-You speech........

Hey, local writer friends......let's go grab a bit to eat, huh? Since I'm not a drinker, I can't go drown my sorrows.

BUT, THIS ISN'T STOPPING ME, IN FACT, I'M ON A WRITING ROLL, SO ......I'LL ENTER AGAIN IN 2018.

* CREATIVE PASSIONS *

The other day I realized that something was happening to me...especially as I wrote and edited, and edited, and edited my entry for the Erma Bombeck competition. And when I wasn't actually at my laptop working on it, I thought about it constantly...jotting notes at work, or in the car... I began experiencing the happiness and desire to write again and to blog more. And last night I felt the need to give that "something" a name - but, there were so many words to describe it that I couldn't choose just one. So, the following words convey how I felt last night and still do this morning!

Reenergized

Rejuvenated

Inspired

Revitalized

Refreshed

Exhilarated

Invigorated

And...Renewed

How glorious it is to have a passion for something creative!

 

~~~

 

 

Below is from an article I came across online:

 

The Motivated Mind: Where Our Passion & Creativity Comes From

By Malini Mohana

 

"So that feeling of intense creativity, or that feeling of euphoria when engaging in something that is truly meaningful to you — it is real and it is something physiological that happens within your brain. It is one of the least researched aspects of psychology, yet it has the biggest impact on our personal lives."

 



~~~

What about you? Do you have a passion that comes and goes, or is it always with you? What works or doesn't work for you? Please share!

* A WRITING COMPETITION *

Hello writer friends! How many of you entered the 2016 Erma Bombeck Writing Competition? I actually managed to get an essay written and submitted before the deadline...which was yesterday. Whew!

I don't remember when I first became aware of the contest, but I know I entered once or twice, way back when I was a novice at writing...I'm talking a real neophyte. Reading through one of those entries was downright painful & embarrassing, but it was also something else...a verification that I've grown as a writer. I definitely believe that being part of a good critique group(s), and writing associations, and having encouraging friends...writers and non writers both, has had a profound effect on me. All of those elements have helped make me a better writer.

Have I grown enough, though, to be a winner in such an eminent competition? Only time will tell....around March 17th, that is!

~~~

 

P.S. I just have to mention that one of my writing pals, Donna Volkenannt, was the First Place Winner (Global Humor Award) in the 2012 Erma Bombeck Writing Competition! I think I was almost as excited as she must've been! I wrote about Donna on my blog: http://beckypovich.blogspot.com/2012/03/my-friend-won-erma-bombeck-contest.html

 

And here is her winning story: http://www.wclibrary.info/erma/winners_detail.asp?id=881&color=&year=2012

 

 

I can only hope that I, too, will become a member of such an elite group of writers.

 

 

Just one of my favorite Erma quotes:

 

“My second favorite household chore is ironing. My first being hitting my head on the top bunk bed until I faint.” - Erma Bombeck   

CALLS FOR SUBMISSIONS, CONTESTS, SPECIAL E-BOOK SALE, ETC!

Hello everyone! I can't believe it's been nine days since my... last confession....Oops! No, that's definitely not what I meant to type. But as I said those words in my mind, some very old memorized lines from my childhood popped right into my head!

I'm at my library branch, using one of their computers because I haven't been able to post anything new on my blog since January 22! It's been driving me nuttier than normal. I could reply to comments on my blog, and on others' blogs, but that's all I could do. I couldn't get to Layout or any other editing type areas. I'm REALLY hoping my son, Scott, can fix it for me.....hope, hope, hope....

Now, here's a truly dumb thing I did, by not doing something. I forgot to print and bring the Word document that contains all the things I wanted to post on here this afternoon.

SO, for now I'll just provide a few tidbits to hopefully get your attention and interest!

**  Please stop by Women's Memoirs at the link below. They're having a fabulous 53 HOUR E-BOOK SALE, to launch their brand new series of four e-books, spring, summer, winter, fall. Please hop over and check them out. The covers are gorgeous and I'm sure the stories included are wonderful!

http://womensmemoirs.com/memoir-writing-news/february-1-the-day-to-get-inspired-and-improve-your-memoir-writing/ 

~~~

**  Julie Luek is the winner of a print copy of my memoir, from Margo Dill's blog when I was the guest blogger. Congratulations, Julie!

~~~

** I have some calls for submissions and contest info....at home in my Word docs. BUT, I think I remember at least some of them:

A call for submissions for a new literary magazine in Ontario, the Tin Roof Press. Our inaugural issue launched with much success in December 2013.  This will be a quarterly magazine, published seasonally.  The next issue - our Happiness issue - will be published in March 2014.  The deadline for submissions is Feb 10, 2014. *Note: I checked with Jen McGuire, the editor, and they ARE accepting submissions from Non-Canadians, too.*

The Tin Roof Press is named after a legendary old bordello that once ran perched high on a cliff overlooking Georgian Bay called the Tin Roof.  It was so named as a nod to Margaret “Mag”  Matthews, an ancestor of mine who was the Madame of the Tin Roof and a local legend. 

The Tin Roof Press is looking for stories full of irreverent humour.  Or tragedy.  Or lust.  Or horror. We want to treat our readers to an exceptionally fun, engrossing read.  And we are looking for writers who feel up to the task.

Submissions of short stories (under 2500 words) and poetry can be sent to jen@tinroofpress.ca.  To get a sense of what we're looking for, check out the pdf version of our beautiful magazine online or email jen@tinroofpress.ca to subscribe if you would like a copy - though they are running out quickly. 

Hope you like the new magazine!

All best,
Jen McGuireeditor/publisher
Tin Roof Press

~~~

** The Erma Bombeck Contest deadline is coming up soon! February 17 at 8:00AM -- EASTERN Standard Time. I suggest sending it by Feb 16, just to be sure! 

~~~

 

I have an exciting bit of news about a new marketing tool I discovered. I have rented a display case at The Cultural Arts Centre in St. Peters, Mo. to advertise and sell my memoir! 

 

Jan. 31-March 24

What's on the Horizon?

All Media Landscape Art Show and Competition

Receiving: Tuesday, Jan. 28, 9 a.m.-8:30 p.m.

Reception: Friday, Jan. 31, 6-8 p.m. 

The reception, as you can see is tonight! There will be all kinds of artwork on display: paintings, drawings, photography, etc....plus the three or four display cases. Stop on by if you're in the area....and we don't get bad weather! 

 

Gotta run.....My time on the computer is about to end!

Thanks for stopping by!

* This 'n That on a Thursday Evening *

You know how thoughts just seem to pop in and out of your head? Sometimes remembered, but most likely forgotten, and some are truly important.

Yesterday I decided I need to order one of those waterproof thingys for the shower, so I can write down those awesome brainstorms before they're forgotten!

Another thing that popped into my head, and where this came from I have NO idea, was that if I had to describe my present-day personality combining three literary characters, they would be: Pollyanna, Little Orphan Annie, and Lucy Van Pelt.

Pollyanna: She always looked for, and found, the good in everything. There was always something to be glad about. As a young girl, every time I watched the movie on TV with Hayley Mills as Pollyanna, I'd get so upset with all the adults in it because they'd get angry at her for always being so cheerful. It just didn't make sense to me, and still doesn't!

Little Orphan Annie: She always looked forward to tomorrow, because things were going to be better then, or at least they could be. She had spunk, self-reliance, and hope. She never gave up.

Lucy Van Pelt: Oh my goodness...there's so many reasons! She's such a smart-alecky, know-it-all, and still says the funniest things.

~~~

Okay, now that I shared that bit of trivia, I must apologize for not getting back to my blog like I kept saying I would. I've been in such a whirlwind that continues to spin, so I'm just going to post the short version.

1) I didn't go shopping after all on Small Business Saturday, except at my local resale boutique and hit the mother lode on great clothes. They were actually in my size, fit perfectly, and of course were very inexpensive. What more could a gal ask for?!

2) Have I mentioned I was interviewed on a local radio station? It was last Wednesday, Nov 27th, the day before Thanksgiving. It was lots of fun and I wasn't a bit nervous. It can be heard here. Just click on Lets Talk Shop for 11/27/2013. Then move the cursor to about 0:55:20. That's where my part begins. 

3) For the very first time, I'm attending the Erma Bombeck Writing Workshop! It's in April of 2014. Yesterday at noon was the opening to sign up and it was sold out within hours! I would've been so disappointed if I hadn't gotten in. I'm still going to submit something to the humor contest though, hoping to maybe win a free workshop like my friend, Donna Volkenannt did last year!

That's it for tonight. Wishing you all a very warm and comfy home if you're in the frigid areas of the world. And to those of you who may be too hot.....as in Australia....I wish you coolness!


"Can I help it if I was born with crabby genes?!" -- Lucy Van Pelt

"Watching your graceful movements on the pitcher's mound lulled me to sleep." -- Lucy Van Pelt

"The sun'll come out Tomorrow, so you gotta hang on till tomorrow. Come what may. Tomorrow, Tomorrow, I love ya Tomorrow. You're only a day away. -- Little Orphan Annie

"See here, little girl, we might just as well settle this thing right now, once and for all," he began testily. "I've got something besides the weather to think of. I don't know whether the sun shines or not."
Pollyanna beamed joyously, "No sir; I thought you didn't. That's why I told you."

* Wow ~ I'm on Erma Bombeck's site *

Pigtails to chin hairs  (My memoir is mentioned)

I'm on Erma Bombeck's Writer's Workshop website! :)

~~~

(All of the below was added after the first three comments. I realized I needed to add more information.)

P.S. I received my first box of books today! 

photo taken with my cell phone (not very good!)

And, no, I didn't have The Ronald take any pictures of ME, because I'd already had huge excitement just when my first proof arrived! ☺

1) I'm not sure when I'll have the PayPal available, so if anyone wants to pay by check or would prefer paying that way, anyway, just send an e-mail to: beckypovich (at) G mail (dot) com

*Update*November 13* 

Books are now available at my website and at Amazon. 

Click on either link and it will take you directly there. 

Thank you in advance!

1) And if purchasing directly from Amazon is preferred, I can always mail a signed bookplate. (if wanted)

~~~

"There are powers inside of you which, if you could discover and use, would make of you everything you ever dreamed or imagined you could become." 

"Joyfulness keeps the heart and face young. A good laugh makes us better friends with ourselves and everybody around us." 

both quotes by: Orison Swett Marden

(I just discovered another new favorite inspirational author!)

* NOT ANOTHER HALLOWEEN BLOG POST *

I've seen lots of blog post titles today about Halloween...and on that subject.. I got nothin'! So, my post is about...Guess what? Writerly things!

~~~

I have another idea concerning bookmarks, but I won't post about it this time until it's more than just an idea. ☺

Right now I'm somewhat overwhelmed with all the marketing information that's out there. I've begun to not only "Save" info in my documents, but also print lots of pages. (I'm old-fashioned that way. I need actual paper and print sometimes!) Especially with all this info. I have a 3-ring binder now so I can keep it all in an orderly fashion. 

I shared some of my newly found information on my October 9th blog post, when I wrote about Sandra Beckwith's fantastic site, Build Book Buzz. If you're a writer and haven't signed up yet for her newsletter, you're really missing a lot. 

Speaking of newsletters, I received Publishing Syndicate's newsletter this morning. I've included the link because it has a wonderful interview with Teri Rizvi, founder of Erma Bombeck's Writers' Workshop. The workshop is held every other year, and 2014 is one of THE years! I've promised myself that I'm going to be able to attend this one...

The writing competition (held every year) opens on January 6, 2014, which is my birthday! ... Hmmm, maybe that will be my good luck charm! One of my local writing buddies, Donna Volkenannt won FIRST PLACE earlier this year! (I don't remember if it was in the Humor or Human Interest category, but it was very funny!)     

* Welcome to my newest follower Amanda Bretz. I hope you'll stop by often and always enjoy what you read and see! *

That's it for now. I'm ending with an inspiring quote...           

"There are people who put their dreams in a little box and say, 'Yes, I've got dreams, of course I've got dreams.' Then they put the box away and bring it out once in a while to look in it, and yep, they're still there. These are great dreams, but they never even get out of the box. It takes an uncommon amount of guts to put your dreams on the line, to hold them up and say, 'How good or how bad am I?' That's where courage comes in.” -- Erma Bombeck

Blazing the Trail of Cosmetics

It was as if I came up with the idea for the flux capacitor! 

~~~

How many of you put on your makeup while standing at your bathroom sink or vanity, looking into the mirror on the wall?

I stopped doing that a long time ago...because I couldn't see that far! Yeah, sad isn't it?

So, now I sit and use a table top mirror positioned about 6 inches from my face. (Not magnified, though. Unfortunately, that side of the mirror shows way too many lines and wrinkles.)

So, just the other day, as I opened up my tube of L'Oreal Eva Longoria lipstick, (which I've had for a long time because I hardly ever wear lipstick) it occurred to me how crazy the world of cosmetics is. 

I'm sure many women buy a certain brand of makeup or perfume just because of whose name is on it. Not me! I buy the cheapest lipstick that has the shade I want. I buy a fairly inexpensive liquid makeup that's the shade I think looks best on me. 

So, as I looked at Eva's fancy signature imprinted on the lipstick's plastic tube, I had a brain storm. Someone should come up with an entire line of beauty products for ladies, ahem..."of a certain age" and it should be named after Erma Bombeck!!

How about.....?

"Erma's Elixir"

"Ms. Bombeck's Magic"

"Queen Erma's Quick Fix"

Everyone join in! What names can you come up with?

(Mine aren't very good, so I'm hoping for some real doozies!) This post is obviously geared toward women, but men can join in, too!

~~~

* Welcome to my newest follower John. I hope you'll stop by often and always enjoy what you read and see! *

~~~

And, of course, I'm ending with all Erma quotes...

"Sometimes I can't figure designers out. It's as if they flunked human anatomy." 

"In two decades I've lost a total of 789 pounds. I should be hanging from a charm bracelet."

"It's frightening to wake up one morning and discover that while you were asleep you went out of style."

MY FRIEND WON THE ERMA BOMBECK CONTEST!

Although I'm actually still on my blog-a-vacation, I just had to post something short, but very important and exciting!!

One of my friends, who is also a Blogger, Writer, and Critique friend.....Donna, OF DONNA'S BOOK PUB...WON.........

1st PLACE IN THE ERMA BOMBECK CONTEST!!

Can you say WOOOO-HOOOOO?!  I am THRILLED for Donna. She's a great writer (obviously) and a great person and I'm proud to call her my friend. AND, I'm extra excited because I am part of the critique group who first heard Donna's winning story!! Go to her blog and read all about it!



"A friend will tell you she saw your old boyfriend - and he's a priest." -- Erma Bombeck

Is It Thursday? I Still Don't Know What Day It Is!

Snippets of This 'n That:

I've been working on my entry for the Erma Bombeck contest. The deadline is February 14th. That should be easy to remember.Valentine's Day. Word limit is 450 words or less. Entry fee $15.00. Good luck to all the entrants!

I recently came across a fun writing site: Nail Polish Stories. I've submitted one story so far. Here are the submission rules: Each story must be exactly 25 words, title not included. The title must be a nail polish color. Intrigued? Hop on over and check it out.

Do you know of The Excuse Editor? If not, you're missing out on LOTS of info for contests and other market news. Tina Haapala does a fabulous job keeping us updated. Sign up now to receive her newsletters!


How about you? Are you writing anything? Submitting anything? Reading anything? I'd love to hear any suggestions you'd like to share!



"You become about as exciting as your food blender. The kids come in, look you in the eye, and ask if anybody's home." -- Erma Bombeck